Yeah, take her cedit cards away from her and cut them up, she don't deserve them at this point. Sorry to sound like a hardass, but its true.
My Mom got into some credit cad trouble several years ago. My dad knew nothing about it (they keep things separete) until he went to the bank one day to get a 15 yr loan on his house vs the 30 he already had. He didn't quailify because of her ****. I was a kid at the time, thing were VERY UGLY. Needless to say, he personally cut up every credit card and the following day set up something at the bank to fix that ****. From what I remember her problem was she kept adding debit, but was paying the minimum on the cars, which was like $10 a month. You can't do that and expect to get ahead. Anyway, he fixed her **** and she had it straightened out within a year or two I believe, it was a good some, like $12,000 or so. Shes still not allowed a CC or anything, all she has is a checkbook. Servers her right.
I'm just like Farns, I had a CC when I was 16 years old and always generally paid them off within a month. My good credit rating is what got me into my house period. I was considered a low risk too and I was surprised since I NEVER had a bank loan before in my life, not even a car loan. I paid cash for my GTP years ago, I didn't want a car payment to deal with. I only had 2 credit cards, thats it. Course I have my savings at that bank too which i'm sure helped a little bit too. But I had no problems getting a home loan, it was fast, easy, and painless. I put down a pretty damn good down payment and got locked in a low interest rate. I was quite happy how things turned out.
What I recommend, keep track of your books. Watch how you spend everything. I get made fun of by friends for keeping a checkbook, but I do and I have never had issues like them with money. Also, put money away and leave it alone, as often as you can. I personally recommend every pay check or ever week putting money in savings, what ever you can. (Off topic use 401k, put in the max match amount you can). When you get a bonus, save it don't throw it away. Unless you have the money on hand anyway.
I laugh all the time when I see people post threads on other boards ""Just got a $1,000 bonus, what should i buy for my car"". Obviously by that statement they don't have the money laying around to buy a few goodies for there car. In my opinon instead of blowing money, they should take that bonus straight to savings and be done with it. If you don't have the money on hand to modify you car or do whatever and can only do whatever when a bonus comes along, you probably shouldn't be doing it anyway. IMO.
Sorry to hear about your situation Brian. Hopefully you can get this stuff fixed without filing for bankruptcy. Take contol of the situation and don't let her have any access to the money. Any and all money goes through you from now on...