..... Yup, double post.
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..... Yup, double post.
Dude Wtf
There are a lot of people who can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in America. Well there's a very simple answer. No one bothered to check the oil, we just didn't know we were getting low...The reason for that is purely geographical, you see all our oil is in Alaska, Texas, California and Oklahoma.
And all our dipsticks are in Washington D.C.
I got another.... hope this isn't too R- rated
Two women friends had gone for a girl's night out. Both were very faithful and loving wives. However, they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers.
Incredibly drunk and walking home, they needed to pee, so they stopped in the cemetery. One of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take off her panties and use them.
Her friend, however, was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them, but was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that.
After the girls did their business, they proceeded to go home.
The next day, one woman's husband was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said,
"These damn girls night out have got to stop. I'm starting to suspect the worst. My wife came home with no panties."
"You think that's bad?!" said the other husband, "Mine is lying in bed with a card stuck in her ass that says:
From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll never forget you."
Nice. Reminds me of one:
A scottish man after a night of heavy drinking began to walk home. After getting about half way there, he started to feel really tired and desided to stop and take a small nap. While resting, two young girls came walking by and noticed him past out in the grass. One said to the other that she wondered if it was true that scottish men didn't wear anything under their kilt. They snuck over and to a keek under the kilt and found what they thought was true. They finished looking and one girl said that she didn't feel right just leaving after looking so she took a blue ribbon from her hair and tied it around his manhood. A few hours later, the scotish guy woke up to nature calling and stepped behind the nearest tree. When he lifted his kilt, he could not beleive his eyes. He said to his little friend, little laddy I don't know where you been, but I see you won first prize.
This was actually mad into a song at a radio station back home and is a hell of a lot more funny.
Lol I read both jokes. Very funny
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