The following story is based on true events and may have been slightly modified for entertainment purposes.
The date was the 13th of July 2011, the day started out as normal as one could expect - get up, get a shower and get dressed and head off for work. It was blisteringly hot outside and humid to match. Making a quick stop by the local bank to deposit some funds, my GP sense started tingling as if there were a formidable opponent near, but today I had a far different opponent than I could ever expect. I get back into my car, close the door and prepare to continue my journey - and there it was on the hood, A mammoth green insect....without any warning....without any respect to my property, the insect sat there ready for war. As I crank the car, the creature and I had an uncomfortable stare-off as I was rolling away out of the bank. As I hit the highway it was an instant battle of epic proportion, hitting the accelerator I quickly climbed to 40....50....60mph....the creature was clamped to the hood like a starving dog to a juicy steak, just staring at me as if he had no respect for my efforts to remove him. The battle continued as he courageously climbed from my hood to the windshield and then straight up to the roof....there was silence for the next mile and my confidence grew as I thought I had won the battle, and then suddenly...like a ninja bug, the enemy appears on the passenger side window as to mock me at my attempts. Another uncomfortable stare-off occurred as I looked into his large green buggy eyes only to see absolutely no fear.....it was time for me to end this, I smash the accelerator and climb to 60....70....80mph, he hunkers down as to increase his aerodynamics, his wings were flapping in the wind as if he were just stretching, and he was hanging tough. Once I realized this foe would not go down with just the usual attacks of wind I had to resort to the dreaded weapon of choice for all removals of unwanted pest on vehicles....the frisbee. Pulling over on a lonely empty street I get out and rush over to the passenger side to finally meet him face to face. You could cut the tension with a knife...he knew he had it coming when he seen the weapon of choice, it was the first time I had seen fear in his eyes this entire battle. After 5 devastating strikes his will was finally broken as he fell dramatically to the ground and jumped off into the grass into the field of defeat.
Somehow I know that this amount of difficulty to get rid of him just wasn't right......
And so I come to the conclusion that.....
......If insects were the same size as us.....we would get owned.
